Zoleil's Blog
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02:37:59, 02/04/26, ZOLEIL SEZ:
BEFORE YOU READ, TURN ON THIS PIECE OF MUSIC! Read slow... :-)
Appreciation for Stuff I Have
Sometimes I whine and mope about how little expressive freedom I have, how I have to cut my hair; how I'll have to
be in the Thai JROTC soon-- but 2 weeks ago, I went to Lumphini Park to take photos. It wasn't until just an hour ago
that I transferred the Raw photos from my camera to my computer, and color-graded them, and posted them that I realized
the things I have now isn't so bad. Life is so beautiful isn't it?
I also went to see a Jazz conference at Mahidol U. of Music, and even though I'm not great at piano or guitar, it
reinvigorated my instrument-bone or whatever. It was beautiful!
Also, this is unrelated, but it's a little sad that it took Superman for people realize being nice is cool! Although,
at the beginning of the semester I was a huge dickhead cause I was soooo sad about my hair.
Anyway, I don't think it's worth transferring schools. My friends are so awesome, and even though the cutting of my hair,
and the restriction of expression and liberty is painful, nothing could ever compare to losing my friends.
Today, I rode back home from school. I just finished playing soccer with my friends, the sky was orange,
I saw small children messing around on a skateboard on the street, I picked up my poster from my school and rode a bike cab back.
On the way I saw many lively things, people kissing, delivering things, the skytrain passing by, helicopters whizzing past,
a plane flying by, my street, filled with trees, the sun shining. And I arrived at my house, and I was home. It was so beautiful. My home, even though it might not be
perfect, and a little broken, it's still my home. And it has people I love. I now realize I could never leave it. I love
my friends so much, and even though sometimes I'm so sad, and lonely, this is the best thing ever.
It's so crazy how much a photo I took made me look back and realize what I have. As I'm writing this I'm crying my eyes
out. Life is so beautiful. This very photo, invoked such a strong feeling, and many memories that I have.
This is a little corny, but I love life so much! So much pain, yet so many great little things that reinvigorate you.
Click the photos to enlarge, see and listen to the music!
01:08:50, 02/02/26, ZOLEIL SEZ:
Spiritual Woes
Sometimes I wonder if the spiritual woes I have is worth thinking about at all. It's trivial
compared to real, physical ails. I've had my fair share of physical ails, like breaking my hand, surgery,
falling -- eating shit & scraping half my face off; but mental woes are much more painful than physical ails
from my experience. Sure, half your face bleeding hurts, but certain spiritual woes, of which cannot be rectified,
hurt much more.
Sometimes I wonder if I should just change schools! It would solve all my spiritual woes, let me grow out my
hair, and, plus, the school is much better if I do move. But I'll lose my friends; what is worth more? My liberty (corny)
or my friends? I don't think my friends could ever be replaced. They are such a unique bunch (but I guess that's what
everybody says about their friends.)
That's all I have to say, it's 1 AM and I need to go to bed!